Jokes palace – dirty jokes and humor

Champion Car Performance Enhancements Posted October 5th, 2012 at 5:41 am in All Time Favorites

Want to be the undisputed performance king of the road? These car enhancements will take that tired early 2000’s Dodge Neon or similar car and transform it into that unrelenting beast others will envy for all of eternity. Chairlift moth zip It has been achieved by others (as a trip to the local strip mall proves), now you too can be the talk of the town.

• Decals featuring random Japanese performance tuning company logos, use several (+5hp per sticker)

• Muffler with sound cognizant of a reverberating fart and the appearance of an apple juice can (ultra +30hp gain)

• Adhesive stick-on side air intakes (+15hp per side from improved air flow)

• Assorted rear view mirror ornaments to improved driving precision

• Painting non-Brembo brake calipers red to obtain Brembo equivalent breaking

• Retina incinerating ultra-intensity aftermarket blue headlights

• After market racing spec gas cap door for improved fuel containment (+10mpg)

• Knight Rider swooping lights on dash – Kitt is protecting your investment 24/7

• Alarm system featuring circa 1980?s multi-pattern audible warning, ultra sensitivity proximity sensor and remote disarm keychain

• Chain license plate surround with scrolling LED screen, let them know who’s the man

And there you have it… the blueprint for transforming a $1,980 car with 132hp into a 300+hp mechanical masterpiece, all without touching a single engine part! Truly a ballistic missile of power.

Deck chair cartoon images Drive on young champion!

For Seal Picture Posted October 2nd, 2012 at 11:39 pm in Funny Pictures

Husband Names Joke Posted September 20th, 2012 at 4:55 am in Dirty Jokes

Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their sex lives. Charlie charlie real game Karen said, “I call my husband the dentist because nobody can drill like he does.” Joanne giggled and confessed, “I call my husband the miner, because of his incredible shaft.”

Kathy quietly sipped her whiskey until Joanne finally asked, “Well, what do you call your boyfriend?” Kathy frowned and said, “The postman.” Looking puzzeled Joanne asked, ”Why the postman?”

“Because… he always delivers late and half the time it’s in the wrong box.”

Gay Truckers One Liner Posted September 18th, 2012 at 4:54 am in One Liner Jokes

Young Fellow Named Paul Limerick Posted September 10th, 2012 at 3:44 am in Rude Limericks

Annual Checkup Joke Posted August 31st, 2012 at 5:39 am in Dirty Jokes

During her annual checkup, the attractive woman was asked to disrobe and climb onto the examining table. Captains chair workout at home “Doctor…” she replied shyly, “I feel uncomfortable undressing in front of you.” “All right,” said the physician, “I’ll flick off the lights. Electric chair games online You undress and tell me when you’re done.” A few moments later her voice called out from the darkness, “Doctor, I’ve undressed. I do cherish you lyrics tim mcgraw What should I do with all my clothes?” “Put them on the chair, on top of mine.”

Toilet Thumbs Up Picture Posted July 28th, 2012 at 7:20 am in Funny Pictures

Dog Versus Wife One Liner Posted July 22nd, 2012 at 8:49 am in One Liner Jokes

Q. A chair for my mother book summary Barking dog at the back door wanting in and your wife’s yelling at the front wanting in. A chair is just a chair lyrics Which one do you let in?

Sex Therapy Joke Posted July 18th, 2012 at 7:25 am in Dirty Jokes

Two women had been having a friendly lunch when the subject turned to sex. Chair yoga san diego “You know, John and I have been having some sexual problems”, Linda told her friend. Free woodworking plans pdf “That’s amazing!” Mary replied, “So have Tom and I. Current chairman of the federal reserve We’re thinking of going to a sex therapist”, said Linda. S chair tom dixon “Oh, we could never do that! We’d be too embarrassed!”, responded Mary. Vintage chair design “But after you go, will you please tell me how it went?”

Several weeks passed, and the two friends met for lunch again. Chair 3d model free “So how did the sex therapy work out, Linda?”, Mary asked. Chair dancing through the decades “Things couldn’t be better!” Linda exclaimed. Chair icon vector “We began with a physical exam, and afterward the doctor said he was certain he could help us. Silverchair emeritus He told us to stop at the grocery store on the way home and buy a bunch of grapes and a dozen donuts. Chair wedding gossip girl He told us to sit on the floor nude, and toss the grapes and donuts at each other. Chairlift moth Every grape that went into my vagina, John had to get it out with his tongue. Chair designer charles Every donut that I ringed his penis with, I had to eat. Chair dips workout Our sex life is wonderful, in fact it’s better than it’s ever been!”

With that endorsement Mary talked her husband into an appointment with the same sex therapist. Charlie card store After the physical exams were completed the doctor called Mary and Tom into his office. Chair pants “I’m afraid there is nothing I can do for you,” he said. Chair exercises for abs at work “But doctor,” Mary complained, “you did such good for Linda and John, surely you must have a suggestion for us! Please, please, can’t you give us some help? Any help at all?” “Well, OK,” the doctor answered. 3 chairs discogs “On your way home, I want you to stop at the grocery store and buy a sack of apples and a box of Cheerios.”

Raping Clown Picture Posted July 13th, 2012 at 7:00 pm in Funny Pictures

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